Jared
2006-07-06

I haven't really been ready to write about it. Exactly. I mean, finding the words to make sense. I guess thats it.

A few days ago, Jeremy showed me a picture of someone. And really, I didn't know what to expect. I mean, actually, he was so up front about it. And I'm glad he was, you know. Its just I wasn't sure how to react.

Jeremy has a son. He's almost two. And he lives with his grandparents in Germany. And his name is Jared. And he's really quite adorable.

Its just he never gets to see him much anymore. Hasn't the past year. Not since he moved back to the states.

Definitely, a sad situation. I mean, he'd spent most of his high school years with this girl he thought he'd be spending the rest of his life with, but it wasn't long after she had Jared that everything changed. He even moved with her and her family from that fort in South Dakota to Germany. Her Dad's in the army.

So yeah, he wanted me to know. And..and its really hard to find that balance of feeling bad for him to, don't make this the reason to be totally in to him, either.

I haven't told Mom. No telling, what her reaction would be.

But I do feel really sad for him. And I know he's pretty much burned about all this, you know. And its great that he's picking up the pieces, etc.

Its just...me..you know..me.

This is so grown up and everything. I've got so much growing up to do. And for starters, I got to stop thinking so much about me.

I really do enjoy Jeremy's comapany. He's so amazing to be around. Its like I forget everything when he's around. He's like this vacation on a busy day. And when I see pictures of Jared, I just wish he was here. I want to meet him, but he'll only be here for two weeks in September.